29 November 2007

You know you´ve lived in Spain when....

I just joined this group on facebook titled you know you´ve lived in Spain when..... and they have a funny list about living in Spain which sums up quite well some spainisms, so I thought I would share my favourites.... (The italics are my explanations for the unexplained spainisms).

1) You think adding lemonade, fanta or even coke to red wine is perfectly acceptable. Especially at lunch time.

2) You can't get over how early bars & clubs shut back home - surely they're shutting just as you should be going out?

3) You've been part of a botellon. a drinking party held in the street/a plaza/anywhere

4) You think it's fine to comment on everyone's appearance.

5) Not giving every new acquaintance dos besos seems so rude.

6) On msn you sometimes type 'jajaja' instead of 'hahaha'

7) You think the precious aceite (olive oil) is a vital part of every meal. And don't understand how anyone could think olive oil on toast is weird.

8) You're amazed when TV ad breaks last less than half an hour, especially right before the end of films.

9) You forget to say please when asking for things - you implied it in your tone of voice, right?

10) You love the phenomenon of giving 'toques' - but hate explaining it in English. (Calling someone on their mobile and hanging up before they answer so that they see a missed call from you on their phone)

11) You don't see sunflower seeds as a healthy snack - they're just what all the cool kids eat.

12) You know what a pijo is and how to spot one. (yuppie)

13) Every sentence you speak contains at least one of these words: 'bueno,' 'coño,' 'vale,' 'venga,' 'pues nada'...

14) You know what 'resaca' means. And you probably had one at least once a week when you lived in Spain. (hangover)

15) You know how to eat boquerones. (fresh anchovies)

16) A bull's head on the wall of a bar isn't a talking point for you, it's just a part of the decor.

17) You eat lunch after 2pm & would never even think of having your evening meal before 9.

18) You know that after 2pm there's no point in going shopping, you might as well just have a siesta until 5 when the shops re-open.

19) If anyone insults your mother, they better watch out...

20) It's not rude to answer the intercom to your flat by asking 'Diga?' (Speak!)

21) The fact that all the male (or female) members of a family have the same first name doesn't surprise you.

22) You know that the mullet didn't just happen in the 80s. It is alive and well in Spain.

23) You know the difference between cojones and cajones (testicles & drawers), tener calor and estar caliente (to feel hot & to be horny), bacalao and bakalao (cod & a type of disco music), pollo and polla (chicken & penis), estar hecho polvo and echar un polvo (to feel exhausted & to have sex) ...and maybe (definately!) you learned the differences the hard way!

24) On a Sunday morning, you have breakfast before going to bed, not after you get up.

25) Floors in bars are an ideal dumping ground for your colillas (cigarette butts), servilletas (serviettes) etc. Why use a bin?!

26) You see clapping as an art form, not just a way to express approval. Olé (the flamenco clap)

27) You know ensaladilla rusa (russian salad) has nothing to do with Russia.

28) When you burst out laughing every time you see a Mitsubishi Pajero (thanks Stuart Line for reminding me of that one!) (Pajero means wanker in Spanish)

29) You have friends named Jesus, Jose Maria, Maria Jose, Angel, maybe even Inmaculada Concepcion...

30) When you make arrangements to meet friends at 3, the first person turns up at 3.15...if you're lucky!

31) Central heating is most definitely a foreign concept. In winter, you just huddle around the heater under the table & pull the blanket up over your knees...and sleep with about 5 blankets on your bed!

32) Aceite de oliva (olive oil) is 'muy sano' (very healthy), of course. So you help yourself to a bit more.

33) When women think that clear bra straps are in fact invisible.

34) When it's totally normal for every kitchen to have a deep-fat fryer but no kettle.

35) When you know what a guiri is / have been called one (slang word for foreigner)

36) When you add 'super' in front of any adjective for emphasis

37) Blonde girls actually start to think their name is 'rubia' (blondie)

38) When you accept that paying with a 50 euro note is going to get you a dirty look if you're buying something that costs less than 40 euros

39) If something is great, it's 'de puta madre'

40) You can eat up to 5 times a day - first breakfast, 2nd breakfast around 11.30, almuerzo, merienda, cena

41) You know the jingle for Los Cuarenta Principales...

43) If you see someone wearing a T-shirt with something written on it in English, you can almost guarantee it won't make sense. (Pebble Night was a personal favourite)

44) When you go into a bank/bakery etc, it's standard practice to ask 'Quien es la ultima?' Who´s the last one?

Now I am going to add a couple of my own.

45) You no longer crave fresh milk

46) You actually start to believe that you might catch the cold of death if you go barefoot in inside the house.

47) You no longer put the plug in to wash the dishes.

48) You bring a toothbrush/toothepaste to work to brush your teeth after lunch.

49) You think its normal to drink champagne at the end of the meal instead of at the beginning (or all the way through for that matter!)

50) You love lentils

51) You know what a pressure cooker is and how to use one

52) The idea of blood sausage or pigs cheek doesn´t make you dry retch but lunge for the plate with a salivating mouth.

53) You know how to tell by taste if the jamon (iberian ham) you are eating is pata negra (black foot)

VIVA ESPAÑA!

7 homie be sending comment love:

Sarah Gemba said...

I always read your blog! Love this group on Facebook!

Anonymous said...

OLA CHICKA ! That was very entertaining. Being of Italian descent as you know Kristy there are many similarities in culture between the Italians and spanish ! One that is exactly the same is being barefoot in the house.. even in summer. My relos would almost die in shock when i would walk around with no socks or shoes on ! I would love to do it and freak them out.. they probably wanted to call their parish priest to come and perform an exorcism on me !
And you know i called you Caliente thinking i was saying you looked hot !! very embarrassing to think when i was in spain i was trying to say to people that it was "mucho Caliente" to say how hot it was but i was saying something like I AM VERY HORNY !! OHH MY GODDDDD !

Mamacita Chilena said...

So many of these could be talking about Chile here. I've never heard of lemonade with red wine, but Coke with wine...count me in!

Others that are the same here...2, 4, 6, 10 (except it's called pinches no toques), 17, 21 (OMG WHYYYY do they all haev the same name?!? I thought that was only here), 22 (OMG EVEN MORE WHYYYYYYYYYYYY, why won't the mullet die), 23, 25, 29, 30, 31, 32, 36, 37, 38, 40, 43, 44, 45, 46 (Chileans are OBSESSED with not being barefoot), 47, 50, 51.

Wow, lots of similarities!

Anonymous said...

Having lived in spain for 5 years i found this highly amusing and my 1st experience at attempting spanish was with one these on the list. Entering the supermarket I asked for dos pollas por favor. The lady burst out laughing shouted to the guy stacking the shelves and repeated what I had said , a few shoppers joined and started laughing as well, I left the shop without buying anything extremley embarrassed and went to see a friend who spoke spanish and after much laughing I was told I had asked for 2 penis's instead of 2 chickens. !!!!!!!!!!

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