30 October 2007

Bad Blogger

So before I blog about my trip with the Tula I will blog about my weekend. It will probably be a very boring blog because it was a very boring weekend.
Marcos left for NY on Saturday, he is gone for 10 days of fun with his cousin although he sent me a text on the first day that read "just walked 3 hours to get to this sordid hotel (his english is SO improving!) NYC is not so cool, Sidney is better." Yay Sidney! Hold on...SIDNEY he can´t even spell it right!!!!!!! Oh so he knows how to say SORDID but not SYDNEY! BAD SPELLER BAD BOYFRIEND!!!
So... on Saturday night, being all alone, I accepted a job being a "hostess" at a climate change conference that was being held here in Seville, to which Al Gore was going to attend. I didn´t really know what being a "hostess" required but having nothing the hell else to do I decided I didn´t care. I got to wear a black business suit, blue scarf, sheer stockings and heels. I felt like an air hostess!! So Glam!! (I am saving it to be my halloween costume). On arrival to the conference I was told that we will be working at the "dinner" not the conference. Then basically all I had to do was tell the people to get on the buses, count them as they got on...and THATS IT! THEN I had to wait, WATCH them enjoy a dancing horse show (el caballo blanco eat your heart out) a bit of flamenco dancing, enjoy a beautiful 3 course meal and get blind drunk. Yes I had to WATCH THEM, all the while standing, and giving directions to the dunnies (toilets) if needed. Oh I was waiting for someone to ask me where the toilet was..all night, it was the hightlight of my duties. I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO BORED IN MY LIFE. If I wasn´t in the middle of nowhere I would have run right out of there. Al Gore didn´t even attend the dinner so I didn´t even get to see him! And whats worse they told me he flew to Valencia on his PRIVATE JET! Um excuse me but isn´t this a conference on CLIMATE CHANGE? and aren´t private planes BAD? I was so bored I wanted to cry. (I really hate being bored) The only thing that kept me going was that I couldn´t stop farting...all night. Don´t know why but maybe my body was also bored and wanted to amuse itself.... they weren´t smelly thank god, but loud! So all I could do to fill in time was try to control myself and release when the coast was clear. Tough night at the office let me tell ya. So then at the end of the night I had to stand by the buses and count the people in. I am NEVER EVER doing that again. B-O-R-I-N-G.

2 homie be sending comment love:

mamacita chilena said...

did you get paid for this or was it voluntary????

oh and I totally get the bad spelling boyfriend (or in this case husband). he will surprise me all the time with the big words he knows, but then he'll write an email and spell my name wrong. gotta love latino men.

Kristy said...

Got paid, not much and not yet. They better pay me man or I will so keep the air hostess uniform.